A rose by any other name...

The boys and I often use aliases. Don't worry. We are not criminals, secret agents, kidnap victims, or protected witnesses. Sometimes we like to make up names as a game, just for the fun of it. Other times, the names are used to go along with the adventure we happen to be on at the time. Example: If we are playing Knights, we would need appropriate, knight names. A good knight name might be Sir Percival the Lionhearted.

I shall start with the real deal. Do you like your given name? I think most people don't, but would you change it if you could? Mine is Julinda, too long & nobody ever gets it right. "Is your Daddy named 'Joe' & your Mom named 'Linda'?" No, & my name is not Jo Linda. It's Julinda, pronounced like Melinda. Although some would argue it is pronounced Jew-linda. I also think Julinda is misspelled, but I wouldn't change it. Maybe I should go by my middle name, Ann.

Colten Tanner was actually Zachary Garrett through my entire pregnancy, but it didn't fit after he was born. Sadly, he remained nameless for 4 days. Colten is pronounced with a short e at the end. It is not Colton. He is mistakenly Colton to most people. My Grandpa called him Tanner Bananner. My Great Aunt says Colt-lyn. The name Riley was also considered for Colt.

Riley Cade was nameless for a few days too. He would have been Reese if he were a girl. Most people wonder why his middle name is Kay. I've also been asked what the K. stands for. Rye was very close to being a Nicholas. My aunt wanted me to name him after the kitten in Colt's favorite book when he was little, "No, No, Nicky".

Nicknames
Mom: Mama Big Booty, Aunt Shalinda, Ju (Someone once asked me if I was offended by being called Jew), Jewels (mostly in high school), Sissy (I used to be Sissy to everyone. I didn't lose this one until after I started school.), I was Pumpkin to my Dad.
Colt: TaTa or ToTo (Colten mispronounced by toddler-aged Madison), CoCo, Hobbitt Feet, My Oldest Child, First Born, Bubba, & Big Bullfrog Bulldog (so named because of his irritating antics while on my bed)
Rye: Y-Tade, Whitey, Wiley, My Youngest, & Little Bullfrog Bulldog (same as Colt)
I call each of them "Sweets".

Spanish Names
Mom: Blanca
Colt: Alejandro
Rye: Tito
We made up Spanish names because Colt is studying Spanish. Although, Rye wants to legally change his name to Tito.

Hobbitt Names
Mom: Ruby Grubb of Little Delving
Colt: Popo Grubb of Little Delving
Rye: Samwise Loamsdown
These names were generated for us. We often call Colt, Popo Grubb.

HipHop Names
Mom: DJ 'Nilla Chilla
Colt: Cheese Masta Funk
Rye: 'Lil Biggie
Again, Colt's gets used often. We're SO gangsta, dawg.

Star Wars Names
Mom: Chazrah (a Jedi Wookie)
Colt: Netloc (a Jedi Human)
Rye: Clox (a mercenary Trandoshan)
We use these playing a Star Wars role playing game. Colt's name is his name backwards.

Pirate Names
Mom: Almost Blind Blythe or Cap'n Bella Deadweight
Colt: Dashing Pike the Pink or Parrotless Pete
Rye: Muck Mutiny or Shark Tooth Stumpy
Everybody wants to be a pirate. We really like the Pirates of the Carribbean movies. Muppet Treasure Island is an absolute favorite. Arrrr, if ye have any small words about it, ye be walkin' the plank, ye bilge rat.

Indian Names
Mom: Sitting Bird
Colt: Quiet Eagle Watching
Rye: Climbing Lizard
Rye named me because I like to sit at the computer. These are just for fun, although I am one-quarter Indian. I know, my dark skin is a give away. My earthly tribe is the Grand River Band of Ottawa Indians. A little Ottawa History. Ottawa Indians refer to themselves as "Neshnabeck" (nishnaabeg) which means "original people". I would like to find the translation for "God's people".

Eternal Names
Our names written in the Lamb's Book of Life.

Rehash

This is a story I told last summer. I'm using it as a filler, so I don't have to write. Outside work is calling me. I still enjoy this story. I hope you do as well.

WARNING: Traumatizing Story

This morning, my brother (Stevie) comes to my house & tells me that I need to come with him. There is a dog that has been ran over on the highway & he is afraid that it is our dog, Coco. So, the boys are asking me questions & I tell them we will talk about it when I get back. Stevie & I drive up to the highway. I can see the dog laying on the other side of the highway. I can see it's a chocolate lab, like our Coco, but I'm still hoping that it's not her. Sadly, it is Coco. There is blood pooled around her head & she is already stiff. My brother loads her in the pickup.

When we get back to the house, I tell Stevie where I want to bury her. We take her to the back of my house near a pond. So, it's time to face Colten & Riley. I knew Colt would take it harder than Rye, because Coco was always "his" dog. We affectionately called her "our fat lard". I've held up pretty good so far, but as I go to tell the boys, the tears start flowing.

The boys are stone-faced until after Uncle Stevie leaves & then as I predicted, Colt breaks down. We hug & cry. I tell Colt to remember that dogs don't have souls, so we don't have to worry about how she is now. She was a dear pet to us while she was here. Riley, in true form, reminds us that Coco was getting old anyway. Didn't we remember she was getting gray hairs? (Rye is always good for comic relief! He offered to shoot a friend's cat before when he heard her complain about the cat.)

Now, Riley goes out to inspect Coco's body while Colt & I are getting ready to go bury her. Colt is pretty emotional, so I tell him if he doesn't want to help me dig Coco's grave, that it's okay. He assures me that he'll be alright.

We start digging the ground near our back fence. Let me tell ya, it was VERY hard. I'm thinkin' there is NO way we are gonna be able to do this! We move over just about a foot & thankfully the ground was a bit softer. It was still HARD WORK!!! It's going to take awhile!


I have to go inside to get a bandana to tie my hair back. While I'm inside, Colten comes running in hollering - "MOM! MOM! COCO ISN'T DEAD!" Ok...I'm freakin' out. I'm thinking....I'm gonna have to shoot my own dog in the head....then I remember... she was stiff as a board, there is no way she was still alive!!

I finally say...."do what?" Colt is screaming..."Come outside, Mom. She's here...she's alive!!!" I go outside & sure enough, there is Coco right outside wagging her tail & licking Colten on the face while he is hugging & petting her. So, now the tears come again...maybe even harder because Colt is so relieved that Coco isn't dead! This is a joyful reunion & Coco is just as enthusiastic as Colt. Rye says, "Do you think this is Coco's ghost?!"


Ok....now....what about the dead dog? Yes, now the story gets interesting.

Colten & I can both say now....after the fact....that her face didn't look quite right, but we both thought it was distorted from getting hit & the stiffness. Wonderful mistake we've made.

I have someone else's dead, chocolate lab in my backyard! What the heck do I do now?! I call my Mom & brother. Stevie & my cousin, Chris, tell me to take it back up to the highway. Are you kiddin' me?! Can you imagine what people are going to think of me unloading a dead dog on the side of the highway? Of course, that's out of the question.


But, what can I do? Colt said..."Mom, if it was Coco & we didn't know she died, wouldn't you want someone to let us know?" Well sure, but I don't even know who this dog belongs to!! I didn't want to go ahead & bury the dog & then the owner have a sentinmental wish to have their beloved pet buried under their apple tree...ya know what I'm saying'?!!

So I call a neighbor to see if he knows whose dog it is. Thankfully, he did. The owner (a lady) had already called crying & asking if they would "get rid of the dog". He said they couldn't figure out what happened to it!! I told him that I would go ahead & bury her dog.


Well, our entire morning was used burying someone else's dog! Digging a grave is NOT easy, let me tell ya!!! We worked our butts off! All the time, "our fat lard" was laying beside us sunning herself.

We are wore out tired & I'm thinking I'll be sore in the morning. Colt said, "Mom, I hope Coco doesn't die again anytime soon."

Picture Charades #10

Colt & I watched this movie last night. We really enjoyed it. 3 words

How Spongebob Works

Spongebob loves karate. He loves to play with his friends. He loves to go jellyfishin'. His favorite song is (singing) "It's the BEEEST day EEEVER!" And if he gets fired, he starts crying. But, he loves his best friend, Gary.

As told by Rye, typed by Mom

It's NOT Okay...Okay?!

I need to write this. As the weather warms and people start removing their scarves, turtlenecks, & stockings, I anticipate the onslaught of visible undergarments & body parts. I know this is a great thing to many people, but not to me.

Let me start by saying that I AM a reformed, bikini wearer. My immodest apparel would challenge the most glamorous street-walkers I've seen. Yes, it took renewed thinking, forgiveness, & mercy. I am thankful.

Let's just start with bathing suits. Most are no more than fancy underwear. Some are quite a bit less. A day at the beach is like a day at Kentucky Fried Chicken, lots of breasts & thighs. I KNOW this is NOT in agreement with wordly thinking. So, if you like this, obviously we are not of the same mind. I could probably just turn my head, but I can't stand for my children to be visually assaulted by this. Leave your underwear under your clothes & put on something that properly covers you!

Next, visible undergarments are NEVER okay. I don't care who's doing it, famous or not. I heard low-slung jeans were out & waistbands were rising again. I've yet to see it. I don't want to see any plumber's crack. This goes for thong undies too. I don't care how cute or stylish they are. This applies to the guys too. Your boxers belong UNDER your jeans. Pull up your pants!!!

Can I see your bra in any way? See through shirts? Yuck. Spaghetti straps or thin tank tops were not meant for the basic bra. Buy the tanks with adequate, built-in bras or invest in a good, strapless model. Better yet, look for more substantial tops. If I can see your bra straps...tacky, tacky, tacky.

I only have one thing to say about those daring, braless gals or rugged, commando guys...Eww. So, moving on.

Are your shorts or skirts too short? Can you bend over without mooning the world? I love to see the cheeks of your beautiful smile, not so much on the other end. If your skirt looks more like a belt, this applies to you. If the inseam of your shorts is the same as that famous, Hazzard County female, this applies to you also.

Bare midriffs are a no-no. I don't care how toned your abs are. If you raise your hands to cheer for those OU Sooners & we see your tummy, you need a longer top. Speaking of the Sooners, don't even get me started on cheerleading outfits. I know this is really preposterous to many, but the outfits of the Dallas Cowgals are primed & ready for the penthouse.

Yes, our culture feeds this. Sex sells & America is buying. Well, I'm saving my money & protecting my modesty. Kudos to all of you who do!

I know this opens me up to ridicule because it goes against conventional thinking. I'm not a prude. Well, maybe I am. Hang on, I just looked it up. "Prude"-a person who is excessively proper or modest in speech, conduct, dress, etc. Excessiveness is never proper, but balance is the key in anything.

Please forgive any fashion faux-pas of mine & I will bear with you too. And now, I will step down from my soap box. I said what I came to say.

Picture Charades #9

Category: Celebrity

2 Words

Picture Charades #8

Category: Movie

3 Words

Yard Work & Photography

I was weedeating, Colt was mowing, & Riley was taking pictures. It was a lovely evening & these are the clouds we were watching. There were flashes of lightning in the middle every now & then. But, the Piper describes it wonderfully... Spring in the South

Composition

Rye's school day always starts with Composition. He's very good at it. Colt has always struggled with writing, but Rye likes it.

Today, Riley had to write another verse to a song they were singing, "Get Along Little Doggies". He asked me if he could write a "God song" verse instead. I told him that he could.

His song:

R God love us this I no.
Yes I do.
He heppeds us in battles.
He heppeds us win we are down.

I told Rye that it is pleasing to God to sing His praises, even more so when the words are from your heart. God always uses my children for my benefit. I am thankful for the reminder today that my words be pleasing to God.

Picture Charades #7

This park pic reminded me of a movie. 2 words

My Meme

BIG HAIR & BIG DREAMS!


Please post your senior picture. Post your wife/husband's senior picture too, if available. I tag Bag, Dawn, Diva, Ash, Sky, Piper, & Half Pint. I seriously can't wait to see!

Picture Charades #6

Category: Celebrity
2 Words

Picture Charade #5

Maybe this will help. 1st word:




2nd Word:

The Diva is too smart for my own good.

Category: Music

2 Words

Picture Charades #4

Category: Music

2 Words

Picture Charades #3

Try this one.

Category: Book/Movie

4 Words

Tagged

This is my current desktop photo.

What does it say about me?

Has everybody been tagged? If not, you're it!

Charade #2

I need charade recruits. My gang doesn't want to pose for the pictures & they are not capturing what I want them to on camera. LOL. This is another easy-peasy one.

Category: Movie

4 Words

Picture Charades #1

Let's see if this translates. We are relying tremendously on your imagination.

Category: Movie

2 words

Hope for the Cookie-less

I have a story involving 5 different people. Of course, there will be 5 different versions of this story. Since this is my blog, you'll get my version. :^)

When I came in to work today I was notified the absolutely wonderful Neighborhood Piper brought in cookies for us. (I think mine & Colt's names were mentioned specifically.) We are talking the real deal cookies, not the almost kind. These cookies were positively unfreakingbelievable - a Ferrari with a full tank of gas.

The cookies were actually delivered yesterday. I was not at work yesterday. The only people at the office were those other two. Yeah, them. You know who I'm talking about. I can't believe the word "integrity" is in the actual name of this business.

Needless to say, the number of cookies delivered & the number of cookies still there today is a subject of great debate. I, myself, enjoyed TWO cookies. Shortly after arriving at work, Colt came to me & said, "There is only one cookie left. Do you want it?" Of course, I let my first-born have the last cookie.

Is there hope for the cookie-less? We can only look to the Piper for pity on the cookie-vacuums at our office. We would glady exchange your empty dish that we have for a full one! I may need my own special batch. With the four guys at the office, it's going to be hard to get my even share.

Thank you so much for your thoughtfulness, Piper!

WOO! HOO!

I found my camera! What a great feeling. I was organizing the pile beside my bed & Hello, camera. I should have known.

The pile beside my bed consists of my current reads. I'm a literary junkie. I REALLY like to read. I wish my house was a library.

Let me share what was hiding my camera. I've been reading "Six Wives: The Queens of Henry VIII" for awhile. I really like the style of the author, David Starkey. "Jane Austen The Complete Novels", "Costume Jewelry", & "Virtual Vintage" are some standbys.

I am currently borrowing several writing books from the library. They are "2007 Writer's Market", "The Art & Craft of Poetry", "The Poetry Home Repair Manual", "Beginner's Guide to Getting Published", "Making & Keeping Creative Journals", & "Writing & Illustrating Children's Books for Publishing". "Not So Big Solutions for Your Home" doesn't fit the writing genre, but was snagged while waiting for the boys.

Used book stores are a favorite hang-out of mine. My latest treasures include "The Complete Poems of Emily Dickinson", "Leonardo Da Vinci", & "The Great Thoughts". I was recently intrigued by Da Vinci while studying Italy with my boys for a Geography Fair. "The Great Thoughts" book made me laugh when I bought it. I was thinking to myself, "You don't have any great thoughts of your own?" The cover says "From Abelard to Zola, from ancient Greece to contemporary America, the ideas that have shaped the history of the world." I have only searched out the section on George Washington so far.

I also have a few publications waiting bedside. They are "OCHEC Informer", "Lucky", a few crosswords, & a sudoku. If you're looking for a fashion/shopping mag without all the sleaze articles & gossip junk, I enjoy "Lucky". I also always have my AVON brochures on hand.

I always have a Bible on hand too. Riley loves for me to read scripture to him while he's going to sleep, very soothing indeed. It is also usually a great time for Bible study with the whole gang.

Riley has a few of his books there too. Our all-time favorite is "Skippyjon Jones" by Judy Schachner. This is one of the best books ever! Rye also has "Cacti & Succulents". He really likes cactus.

Ok, now that I have my camera, I can get busy on my new idea, picture charades. Wanna play?
Well, I can't get started on that until I finish my taxes. So, I'm off to it. Do I work for a CPA? That's right, I do...

Major Payne

We have sickness in our house again. Colt is battling a second round of it. He has had a cough since last Tuesday. I had to take him to the doctor on Friday. She gave him pneumonia-strength antibiotics. There was an improvement on Saturday. Sunday, he was zapped again. The fever & aches came back. We all three have confidence in God's healing for Colt.

We stayed home from work today for rest & healing for Colt. I am thankful to say that he is much improved. He has a low-grade fever, but doesn't feel bad.

This morning, I had to run to Velma to the bank. I left Riley in charge. You should have seen the sparkle in this kid's eyes. I explained to him that you have to be compassionate when you're in charge. Everything that you give, you'll get in return from those in charge of you. I also went over a few of the important house rules. I told him that he would need to care for Colten because he is sick.

I left & had to stop at my family's office to pick up my cell phone from my Mom. They asked where the boys were & I explained they were at home. I told them Riley was in charge. They unanimously felt sorry for Colt.

As soon as I left the office, I called home. Both boys answered. I told them I had my phone & asked them how things were going. Colt told me right after I left, Riley shouted, "Okay, drop and give me twenty!" They both giggled & Riley said, "Yeah, but I almost baked him cookies."

How do you "almost" bake someone cookies?

Zoinks!

I spent a lovely evening with my family last night. It was my Uncle's birthday. We enjoyed cake & ice cream along with an evening of entertainment provided by my cousin, who is a first responder & volunteer fireman. He has so many stories!

If you ever get the chance to hear a first responder share their stories...run. Go hide in the closet, offer to do the dishes, anything to spare yourself. I'm just kidding...kinda. Some of these stories would make a goat puke, some were funny, some were serious. Of course, you have to know my cousin. All of his stories were wildly entertaining & tearfully hilarious. His wife said that he & his buddy are like the Scooby-Doo & Shaggy of the first responders & firemen.

On a serious note, I want to say thank-you to my cousin & the other volunteers & officials for their efforts on behalf of our community. (You deserve a Scooby snack!)